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Until we meet again my brother

10/21/2020

14 Comments

 
On October 20, my brother Mark Waino Drazenovich shuffled off his mortal coil and began a new journey. My prayer, hope, and expectation is that he is at peace. And my faith provides me certainty that I will see him again.

I have many memories of my older brother and our many conversations. He was an educator with an eclectic spirit. He too was his father's son and followed his path as an educator with a heart, especially, for those students who were the most marginalized in our society. 

Mark studied at the University of Kings College in Halifax, Nova Scotia. He grew to love the spirit of the Maritimes; its culture and the English, Scottish, and Irish heritage that exerts such an influence on that region of Canada.

At my father's funeral, Mark delivered the eulogy, and perhaps in a moment of transference or perhaps a more felt sense of spiritual kinship, admitted that my father was a complicated man. In this he drew on our Catholic tradition of the saints who offer important insights into the nature of human beings. One of the great English saints, admired by Mark,  St. Thomas More, said:

 “God made the angels to show Him splendor, as He made animals for innocence and plants for their simplicity. But Man He made to serve Him wittily, in the tangle of his mind.”

This image of serving God, intellectually, in the tangles of our mind resonated with my brother. All of us experience conflicting motivations, impulses, defences, delusions, occurring within ourselves as we strive to live a full life. But that is not psychopathology; that is how we are created. Our very purpose in this life is to serve God, wittily, within these very tangles. We cannot avoid them. In fact working through these very tangles to forge a just society and a meaningful life is what constitutes our human dignity.   

Mark embraced his contradictions and conflicts. His spirit was a free one. It was not conventional. He did not teach in a conventional school (he taught students who society or the education system had marginalized). He did not live a conventional life or remain in the stable institutions such as marriage that our society and ecclesial institutions afford us. He moved from northwestern Ontario, to the Maritimes, and finally to California for the last well over 30 years. And notwithstanding the length of time spent in California, he was planning, after retirement, to move again to Alabama for reasons known only to him. He loved his estranged wife Ann and it was a regret that he could not make that work. Yet, in and through all of this he remained a devout and practicing Roman Catholic until the end of his life.

He eschewed advice from his brothers who when calling him urged him to go to the hospital the day before he died. He complained of sore ribs and a sore throat. He forthrightly refused to attend to these matters for reasons none of us remaining behind will understand. But such is the dignity of human choice and self-determination.

For those of us close to him, we loved him in all his complications, contradictions, good humour, sarcastic wit, and sentimentality. He shared once with me a poem by Robert Frost that captures the essence of who Mark is an was. It is entitled, "The Men Who Don't Fit In".

There's a race of men that don't fit in,
    A race that can't stay still;
So they break the hearts of kith and kin,
    And they roam the world at will.
They range the field and they rove the flood,
    And they climb the mountain's crest;
Theirs is the curse of the gypsy blood,
    And they don't know how to rest.
 
If they just went straight they might go far;
    They are strong and brave and true;
But they're always tired of the things that are,
    And they want the strange and new.
They say: "Could I find my proper groove,
    What a deep mark I would make!"
So they chop and change, and each fresh move
    Is only a fresh mistake. 
 
And each forgets, as he strips and runs
    With a brilliant, fitful pace,
It's the steady, quiet, plodding ones
    Who win in the lifelong race.
And each forgets that his youth has fled,
    Forgets that his prime is past,
Till he stands one day, with a hope that's dead,
    In the glare of the truth at last. 
 
He has failed, he has failed; he has missed his chance;
    He has just done things by half.
Life's been a jolly good joke on him,
    And now is the time to laugh.
Ha, ha! He is one of the Legion Lost;
    He was never meant to win;
He's a rolling stone, and it's br
ed in the bone;
    He's a man who won't fit in.
 
In a moment of serendipity, in on one of our Skype calls, we were discussing, of all things, King Lear. Mark shared with me his favourite Shakespearean quote. I imagine my brother as the favoured child Cordelia and my father as King Lear taking Mark's hand and saying "come Mark let's take upon 's the mystery of things, As if we were God's spies".
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14 Comments
David Drazenovich
10/22/2020 11:12:36 am

How blessed am I to call you both brother.

Reply
Mark McCaig
10/22/2020 11:41:43 am

I’ve known the Drazenovich family for most of my life and was particularly close with Mark. On October 20th I had a milestone birthday of 60 years and while pondering that I learned of Mark’s passing. Draz had a positive impact on my life and someone who I shared many conversations regarding mutual passions such as music,
literature, sports and politics. Draz had a sharp mind and did not suffer fools gladly. Draz was not someone to cross swords with in most conversations on most topics. We had lots of fun over the years and he was a good friend. I haven’t seen him in many years which always made me sad but I knew that we could come together if we tried. For me, this a real blow. I always considered Draz one of the truly interesting people that came into my life and brought me considerable joy, intellectual stimulation ,passion and friendship. I have only the warmest regards for Mark’s family at this time.

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George Drazenovich
10/22/2020 11:57:05 am

Thank you so much for the kind words. They mean a great deal

Reply
Dan Drazenovic
10/23/2020 12:47:32 am

Thanks for your kind words Mark.It provides us with much needed comfort.

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Adina Lamprecht Herrmann
10/22/2020 07:20:10 pm

I’m so sorry for your loss. I have such fond memories spending time in San Diego with Mark. I looked up to him as he shared his wisdom and humor. My deepest condolences to you, your mom, your siblings and extended family.

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Nathalie von Niebelschutz
10/22/2020 07:39:49 pm

On behalf of the von Niebelschutz family, I offer my sincere condolences to June and her entire dear family. Love, Nathalie

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Daniel Paul Drazenovich
10/23/2020 12:54:48 am

Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died.(A) 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”(B)

23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”

24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection(C) at the last day.”(D)

25 Jesus said to her, “I am(E) the resurrection and the life.(F) The one who believes(G) in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing(H) in me will never die.(I) Do you believe this?”

27 “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “I believe that you are the Messiah,(J) the Son of God,(K) who is to come into the world.”(L)

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Marion allison
10/28/2020 04:55:07 pm

Saddened to hear ( in disbelief) of Marks passing. As George has so eloquently and thoughtfully shared I too found Mark to be an interesting, certainly intelligent and complex person. My memory is of his staccato comments as he held court amongst peers. Condolences to all the Drazenovich family. Eternal be his memory


Reply
Ernie Brunetta
10/29/2020 10:06:50 am

Very well written my deepest Condolences to the Drazenovich families.

Reply
Belinda (Payne) Knopf
10/30/2020 02:25:30 pm

I was saddened to hear of Mark’s passing. All who knew Mark were blessed by his humour and kindness! It makes me smile just thinking of him! He was a truly a wordsmith, and I remember still to this day, a beautiful letter he sent
me many, many years ago. You have written a touching tribute to your brother and I thank you for sharing it. This Sunday is All Saints Day, and is our practice, I will light a candle in his memory! May the peace of Christ hold you all as you grieve together such a loss.

Reply
Gail Roach-leforte
10/30/2020 05:35:00 pm

I attended St. Francis when the Draz family moved to the Fort. I was in the same grade as Mark until gr. 5. It's so strange that a few weeks ago i was reminiscing about grade school and was sharing with a few of my kids about some favorite memories. I told them that in gr. 5 I used to ride the bus with Mark and a few others; we always sat together in 2 or sometimes 3 seats. We would laugh, debate various "gr. 5 issues" or best of all we would croon one of the top 10 songs. I particularly remember that we sang 'Cecelia ' by S&G. It was a short journey (as Mark was the first off the bus) but it was every school day so that kind of daily routine leaves memories that are warm. Gr. 6 sent Mark and I in different direction; by the time we were together at St. Mary's, we had both developed new friendships. We always had the "hi" and nod throughout highschool but, as i said, the childhood memories are priceless!!
I am saddened to hear of his passing! I send sincere condolences to all of the Draz family! I will pray for your healing in this time of grief...but I also know that Mark is on an even better and more beautiful journey!!
Miigwech
Gail

Reply
Ann Taylor
11/7/2020 02:35:57 pm

My sons and I send my sincerest sympathy to you and your family. I was deeply touched that you mentioned me in this blog. Mark is the love of my life and I will always treasure what you wrote. He was a wonderful influence on my three sons. All of your family will always hold a special place in my heart. May God bless you and your family through these difficult times and in all the days ahead.

Reply
Mary
5/28/2021 07:11:56 pm

i finally read this again at the time I was too grief filled to hear it. Thanks George it is a work.of art. I will read over and over. They say when we cry God is with you and I'm crying now.

Reply
Stanley Busby
3/26/2022 09:07:06 pm

I'm horribly hurt to hear the one of my beloved teachers had passed away nearly two years ago. I, have always thought of him and occasionally visited him at school after I had graduated. My highest regret was never getting an invitation sent his way for my wedding in 2018 before moving out of California. I had left high school in 2004 and still thought of him. His impact on my growing up was permanent.

Mr Drazenovich (or Mr. D as we called him because no one knew how to spell his last name) really cared about us. He was incredibly passionate for us special ed kids and knew we all had great potential. He really did treat us all with the greatest respect as was already mentioned, students who been marginalized by the education system. Mr. D wanted us to be successful in life and to always analyze the human condition. His love for pistachios and morning mud (coffee) was something I always enjoyed from him in the morning.

I always thought of him as a great father figure and a role model. I'm always felt thankful to have found such a caring teacher in my fragile high school years. I love you Mr D...

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    The title of this blog is an allusion to the famous work of Blaise Pascal.  This blog represents the variety of my interests and thoughts on any given day and are  strung together, like Pascal's Pensees, in no particular order. I work in the field of mental health,  education, and human rights. I write and am a human rights advocate. I enjoy poetry, jazz, spirituality, politics and a potpourri of other interests that you will see reflected in this blog.

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